Wow! Has it really been that long since the last time I updated? Well, I have written a post many times in my mind, but haven't gotten around to actually putting it out their in the blog world. I thought with summer peaking around the bend that my life was going to ease up a bit, but it has actually become busier. Having four children at home, taking them to various summer camps and activities, softball tournaments, and Caden's appointments certainly keeps our days very full. We were able to take a nice little family vacation a few weekends ago to attend one of Natalie's softball tournaments in San Diego. Because it can be so hot out there on the fields my mom and Chad's mom took care of our sweet Caden. Aren't they saints?! We took full advantage and went to Sea World and thoroughly enjoyed our freedom. We had some amazing friends make the drive to San Diego at 6:00a.m. on a Saturday morning to catch Nat's 8:30a.m. game. They brought all three of their kids and we all had a really fun weekend.
Caden has been doing quite well lately. We received a string of good news and then heard some upsetting news. The good news has come from the neurologist and the therapists. The neurologist thought Caden looked pretty darn good and does not feel he has cerebral palsy which was something of a concern considering his tight joints. She did not feel he needed any further testing and wanted us to just continue with his physical therapy. That was a relief for sure. I was dreading that appointment and it went really well. Caden's therapists feel that he is doing great. He is starting to swallow a lot better during his feeding therapies. He has barely any more reflux and I can't even remember the last time I had to use the bulb syringe. Yeah!! He is also taking 50cc's an hour now which is a 10cc increase from where he was. So, when Caden's follow-up cardiologist appointment came up I really wasn't too concerned. I told Chad I would take Caden on my own because it should just be a quick check-up. Well, the doctor dropped a bomb on this unsuspecting mother. He informed me that Caden has a muscle in his heart that appears to be thickening. There is no treatment other than to give him a medication that will slow his heart rate. I asked what this all means for Caden and received the standard answer for our son's prognosis,"It is a wait and see thing." If Caden's life hasn't been a lesson in patience then I don't know what is. I came home very heavy hearted, but, again, realized there isn't much I can do in this journey of Caden's life but to just enjoy the moment. I so appreciate that lesson he has taught me. I dig much, much deeper each day to pull the joy out.
My sister just graduated from High School on the year anniversary of me finding out Caden had a cleft lip. I will never forget that day, and as I watched my sister step into a new chapter of her life I realized how far our lives have come since that frightening day I learned my baby would be born with a birth defect. Our lives, I believe, are so much richer because of Caden. I don't take a thing for granted (or at least I try not to). My parents had a beautiful party in celebration of my sister's graduation and so many wonderful people came and met our son for the first time. I tell you, he sure was the hit of the party if I do say so myself. It so touched me when people came over to me to say they have been following the blog and just think Caden is beautiful and doing so well. It really meant more to me than these people will know to hear those words and see everyone smiling and fussing over our little guy. We are surrounded by the most remarkable people, really.
Today at Caden's usual therapy appointment I struck up a conversation with another mother I see every Tuesday. She has four children, too. Three of her children are her biological children and one of them is adopted. Her adopted daughter is the one receiving therapy. I asked her today if she had always wanted to adopt. She said she did, but became very serious about it when her drug addicted sister was pregnant. She adopted her niece and now takes care of all of her needs. We were both saying that even though it is really tough to raise children that need all of this extra care, it sure brings a special component to the family. We agreed that our lives and the lives of our other children were really enriched being on this unique path we were on. She said that in the beginning it was really hard to hear that her daughter's future is uncertain, but then her husband said,"But what matters most is she will be happy. She will be happy and she will be loved." I told her that being happy and loved is really 90% of what makes a great life. She just reached out and hugged me. It was like we had this unspoken understanding. In those moments I am grateful that because of Caden I have met such inspiring, amazing people.
Thank you, Caden.
Mary
Thank you to all of you!! He is growing and meeting his milestones because of the devotion that you have given him. I was so very proud of your sister Saturday but I was really very proud of both my girls. You have risen to a level of parenting that many never experience and may not want to. I have seen through you that life is even sweeter when you are touched with such a special child and when you embrace it as you all have. So thank you!! Love you xoxox Mom
ReplyDeleteHi Mary,
ReplyDeleteI've been watching for your post all week -hoping you would update soon. I have to stop reading these while at work. Your stories are very touching and move me to tears. I sit here with tissue and my coworkers wondering what is up. We are all so inspired by your incredible stories. You have quite a few admirers that you are not even aware of.
I'm so sorry I missed seeing everyone and meeting Caden on Saturday. I hope I can meet up with you guys soon - especially with Kathleen moving down here.
I am so happy to hear you are all thriving and that Caden is doing so much better.
Much Love...Aunt Linda
You guys are just the cutest family! Mary, Caden is looking so grown up to me - he is so handsome and precious!
ReplyDeleteThinking of and praying for Caden's sweet heart, and thinking of you as your own mamaheart remembers those "one year ago today" moments (those hit me hard with Viv - but, like you, I remember being amazed at how much can change in a year - in beautiful ways).
xoxo
*hannah
Beautiful photos! Your last sentence brought me to tears. I always say because of my sons funny little lip we have met the most amazing people who we would never know existed! Thank you Mary for sharing your journey! Continued strength to all of you and hugs to sweet Caden.
ReplyDeleteKate
DITTO on Kate's and the others...Mary, don't ever forget what a truly amazing mommy you are! My summer is slipping away, but I'd love to try and squeeze in a visit? Let me know...
ReplyDeleteI just love, love, LOVE seeing all those beautiful smiling faces! We hardly see any of you anymore, except to wave :( Mary and Chad, you amaze me. Your family is so dear and you're both doing such a great job. Keep the posts coming.
ReplyDeleteLove, Sharon
Mary,
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing, isn't it, the lessons our children can teach us?
I love that, in the presence of so many challenges, unexpected news and unknown prognosis, you are able to see so much positive... and that's because there is so much, but it sometimes is harder to see that. Thank you for sharing your wonderful perspective.
I am sorry about the news regarding Sweet Caden's heart and am hopeful that the medication will manage it well.
Big hugs to you all...
Kristi